Marriage: when do you believe one is “too young” to be married?

I have been born and raised in the south, so all of the stereotypes that we are thought to “be,” I have witnessed them my entire life. One of these includes the stereotype that we all get married at a really young age. When I say younger age, I am saying anywhere between the ages of 19 and 24. And I’d say that stereotype is true. 

A quick fun fact about myself… I am a senior in college and this past summer I attended 9 different weddings for my friends that had just recently graduated this past May. Is that a little crazy to you? It was (and still is) crazy to me. Example A of how that stereotype is fitting and true. 

As popular and as known as it is for couples to be getting married at a young age, divorce rates are found to be at an all time high right now. 1 in every 2 married couples end up divorced. That statistic scares me, which is why I don’t know that I wish to be married at a really young age. (so anytime soon!)

Some people may be marrying at young age because they think that it is “what they are supposed to do.” Some people may be marrying at a young age because they are scared of ever being alone. Some people may be marrying at a young age for the financial benefits, or from the pressure of parents and friends. 

In America, marriage is a mutual decision between the couple deciding that they want to commit their lives to one another for the rest of their time on earth. There are no arranged marriages, and you don’t have to ever be married if you don’t want to or if that just “isn’t in the plan.” In other countries, it’s a little different. 

I researched what marriages are like in other countries, with factors such as age and family pressures, and I came across a really interesting fact from Japan. I was intrigued by the differences in culture across the globe. 

Here it is. Japan is one country that continues to practice the act of an arranged marriage to this day (Yes, even in the 21st century). There is an important figure in the Japanese culture who is called the ‘nakodo’ and is considered to be a formal match-maker. The nakodo will initiate the match between a potential couple, then that potential bride and groom will meet for the first time with the parents in on the meeting, then decide if they are suitable to marry, make the decision, then marry. 

Did you hear that?! Is that not crazy? It is completely different from how Americans view marriage. 

Age is a factor in Japan, but being too young or too old doesn’t necessarily exist there because they all get married about the same age. 

I believe that marriage is a beautiful thing. I believe that it is something that does NOT need to be taken lightly and it is something that needs to have a lot of thought put into it. I believe that “too young” is 18-20 is too young to be married. 

Some may say that anywhere in your 20’s is too young. Some may say that marriage just is not the right decision. To each their own in that sense. 

What do you believe?!

References:
By the End of the Twentieth Century in Japan, Approximately 30 Percent of Marriages Continued to Be the Traditional Arranged Marriages Called Omiai. One of the Most Important Figures in Japanese Arranged Marriages Is That of the ‘nakodo’ Who C, Kayla. “Countries Where Arranged Marriages Are Common.” Futurescopes.com – Horoscopes, Astrology, Love and Dating | Futurescopes.com. Futurescopes.com, 2014. Web. 02 Nov. 2016.

 

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2 thoughts on “Marriage: when do you believe one is “too young” to be married?

  1. How are you not worn out from all those weddings?! I believe people are beginning to forget the reason for marriage and just believe they need to find someone at an “early age”. Marriage should not be taken lightly like you said. People get married so fast and so early without even thinking about it and divorce is so easy to do now and that’s why the rates have sky rocketed. Great blog!

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  2. I thought this article was really interesting, even just by the title! I grew up in the North and was honestly shocked at the culture in the South, but especially when I saw girls in my sorority getting engaged their junior and senior years in college! That was insane to me. It’s not that we’re told not to get married until an older age, but it definitely isn’t as expected at home as it is here in the South. I thought the fact about the Japanese still having arranged marriages was insane because Japan is such a technologically advanced society, that I figured they were socially advanced as well. Great post and an interesting read!

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